There are difficult decisions to make when it comes to an aging or ailing pet, and there is no one answer for when it is the right time to say goodbye.
That’s what a Saskatchewan SPCA webinar was all about with guest speaker Bev Ashwin who facilitates a pet loss support group in Saskatoon.
If you are wondering if it is time, Ashwin suggests listing five things your pet likes to do, and then thinking about how many of them do they still enjoy doing.
Look at whether that quality of life is still there.
When it comes to grief, everyone handles it differently, and not everyone considers a pet a family member, which Ashwin says can lead to feelings not being validated when someone is grieving and a family member, friend or co-worker suggests they are just a pet, and you should get over it.
Ashwin stresses you are allowed to feel as much grief as you feel.
Pets are a part of our daily lives, so for many people, they become family, and for others, they are even more than that.
Ashwin gives a few examples: “Perhaps they live alone. Perhaps they have no family support. If it was an elderly person or someone who lives alone, it could be their only reason for getting up in the morning.”
She advises that if your grief isn’t validated or understood by those around you, find someone who will validate your feelings.

When it comes to what to say to someone who has lost a beloved pet, Ashwin has a list of things not to say, including “everything happens for a reason” because some things like a tragic, unexpected loss are random and devastating.
Don’t say ‘you just need to focus on the positive’. Instead find the people and places where you know it’s okay to grieve, and don’t say ‘they are in a better place’ because the best place for your beloved pet is always going to be with you.
The pet loss support group facilitator also touched on making plans in case your death comes before your pet’s. “Make sure you have something written down, that Fluffy or Spot is being looked after by somebody and make sure that your family knows who that person is, and make sure that person is willing to look after your pet.”
Ashwin stresses that the solution shouldn’t be to let a rescue or humane society take care of your pet until it finds a new home, because most are already over capacity.